Ode to You People...Who Expose Me to SPAM!

ODE TO YOU CLODS WHO EXPOSE US TO SPAM!

A poem


O, to be able to reach through the screen
And strangle you users who seem to believe
That stories about Jesus not found in the Bible
--are remotely entertaining, and perhaps even liable

To cause one to read it as fast as one can,
while fighting off torrents of noxious SPAM.

To you people who think that FORWARDING means
The same as REPLY TO ALL.  It seems
that you fail to realize that you scoop in one mess--
Everyone's email.  But I digress...

I do not blame the purveyors of SPAM;
they are sellers indeed.  At least they can plan
to sit on the beach on one fine day--
While I toil and toss hundreds of emails a day.

Still,  what does it take to get SPAMMERS to see
that I do not want to augment my wee-wee?
Or that tawdry harlots offering me a date
are definitely and thankfully forty years too late!

The problem is you, my email friend,
who hits REPLY TO ALL without edit or end.
What does it take to get you to stop
including my email address in your haphazard slop?

I blame you, my friend, for you need to learn
how to use a computer.  Indeed I yearn
for the day you learn to use "BCC" not "CC",
And not subject my email to senders of feces.

Very soon, I will retire yet another address
that has become a swamp of unwanted distress.
I won't share this address with clods like you,
Who expose others' emails like sharing the flu!

I won't share, but I wish at the highest cost
that YOUR systems are infected, at the utmost loss
Of YOUR time, YOUR data, YOUR width of band--
It serves you RIGHT!  For inviting SPAM!

Always B. Positive!
(But not this time!)

c 2015 by Thomas Wilson