DRESSING UP FOR THE HOLIDAYS (AND BEYOND)...

     There is something unsettling about this time of the year.

     It seems that Fall and Winter are the Seasons of costumed excess and endless charades. My oldest daughter works for a certain mouse-oriented organization, but for Halloween (on her own time) she was Harley Quinn, the creepy consort of the Supervillain The Joker.   I mentioned to one of my pious brethren that it seemed like there were more older kids dressing up than younger.  Parroting the words so many other self-ordained prophets, he stated that "Christians should have nothing to do with pagan-based Holidays like Halloween, Christmas and Easter". 

     Personally, I don't care either way, but I asked him:  "Is participating in Halloween or Christmas any worse than supporting college and pro sporting events, which profit directly from alcohol sales and advertisement?  (He was dumbfounded; I just love to knock people off their soap boxes!)

     Still, I find this time of the year to be a little unsettling.  Is it because of the over the top commercialism?  On a daily basis we are bombarded by merchants, who tell us that our lives aren't worth living unless we spend ourselves into oblivion.

     Is it because we just ended a rather brutal political cycle, during which we learned to distrust every person sitting 'across the aisle'?   (I am reminded of an old song by Steeler's Wheel:  'Clowns to the left of me, jokers to the right.  Here I am, stuck in the middle with you!) 

   

     Is it because I am a Secret Scrooge?  I doubt it, because I gladly volunteer to scarf down baked goodies (and even the 'baddies'.  I love fruitcake!)

     As always, with a shrug I look past the tinsel and the dunsel to see the bottom line. The true meaning of any Holiday is to appreciate what we've got.   

     My oldest daughter - 'Harley Quinn' - just told us that she won't be coming home for Christmas because she has to work.  I am happy because "The Rat Company" has her working full-time; however, I am realizing that this will be the first Christmas that she will be away from home.  I still have one and 'a half' children still living at home.  My son is still in high school, while my middle daughter (the 'half' - 100% my DNA but only occasionally here) is home from college for the break.  Right now she is sitting across from me sewing some wierd Cat In The Hat - type hoodie, while she chuckles at some cartoon movie on computer. 

     I am not so naive as to think that everyone is blessed with this; after all we have news of endless war, school shootings and economic turmoil blasting at us 24/7.  Add to these the horrible things that are never reported in the media.  Yet I have met enough survivors of horrific events to know that everyone can at least reach for some sense of inner peace.  Whether it starts from within or without, from dogma or doctrine, I cannot tell.  But when I shut out the world, whatever bitterness and disappointment I feel simply melts away.

     Perhaps it is as simple as looking in a different direction, of thinking differently.  

     Perhaps it is as simple as putting on a costume, in the heart and in the mind.

     Always Be Positive!

Attack of the Zombies (a true story...somewhat!)

     "WATCH OUT!"

     The creature shuffled toward us steadily, its glazed eyes targeting us like a hawk hunting his next meal.  From just a glance I could tell that he was beyond sick.  His clothes were but rags.  His feet were filthy and his hands were covered with blood.  His eyes were crusted over with infection.

     "Dad, what are we going to do?" my young teen son asked.  I looked at him; he wasn't ready to this.  For the first time I felt ashamed at the safe, comfortable, middle class lifestyle I had given him.

      Deftly, I snatched the axe from the corner of my garage.  The creature had begun to charge and I knew I had one shot.   I placed my right hand near the top of the axe (my left was at the bottom),  placed the head over my shoulder,  lifted the blade straight up and hurled it forward.   As if in slow motion, my right hand slipped to the bottom of the handle.  The razor sharp edge, hurled by my strength and Newtonian physics, hacked into the zombie's cranium.  His skull split open, revealing a mass of rotting, grey and red brain matter.  The axe, finding little resistance in the weakened flesh, continued downward through the neck and halfway into the chest.  I pushed.  The monster fell backward, away from me.  I yanked out my weapon and beckoned to my son, who was in shock.

     "Come on" I said.  "Let's find some more!"...

     Actually, I didn't kill anybody.  The axe in question does sit in my garage, but I only use it for chopping firewood.  I'm good for 10 minutes before my testosterone fails; then I go buy some wood from the old man selling on the side of the road.

     And the zombies...they're real.   In real life they're called:  Christians, Atheists, Mormons, Jehovah Witnesses, Baptists, Methodists, Democrats, Republicans, Right to Lifers, Pro-Choicers, Independents, Northerners, Southerners, African Americans, Whites, Asians, Native Americans, citizens, aliens, educated, uneducated, Gun Lovers, Gun Controllers, Anarchists, etc.  If I have neglected to name at least one group of which you are a member, then please feel free to fill in the following blank (offense intended): ________________________.

      Now it is time for my disclaimers:  I believe that most people are basically good, and that we have the right to have our own opinions and affiliations; however, I also believe that we each transform into The Walking Dead when we take the lazy way out.  I receive robocalls from both Liberal and Conservative Candidates who blame all of this country's problems on their opponents.  I have friends who swallow everything that comes from their pastors, including (philosophically) things that belong in his toilet.  I have friends who are so vehement in their atheism, that their anti-religiosity has become a religion unto itself.  I know citizens who think illegal aliens picking fruit are stealing their MBA-level jobs.

     I know myself.  I postpone decisions.  I extend deadlines.  I table serious discussions until later, which often never comes. 

     Perhaps we are all creatures of bad habits.  Perhaps we all need to kill off our lazy selves, the unproductive tendencies, the waste.  Perhaps we need to whet the edges of our axes, by improving our skills, getting additional certifications, expanding our knowledge base and leaving our comfort zones.  Perhaps we need to challenge our leaders and organizations when they fail to "practice what they preach."

     All I know is that the zombies are coming, along with the life-sucking / monster-creating force that creates them.  So get your axe ready and join the hunt!

     Always B Positive!

The Wizard and the Craftsman

     The Wizard had returned.  He strode in to retrieve the last of his acquisitions, most notably the sea dragon pups that had been kept in ether and his divination stones culled from the hellish depths of the earth...

     Actually, the pups were formaldehyde-preserved baby sharks, which would soon be subjected to high-intensity MRIs.  The divination stones were large geos, curious collections of semi-precious stones taken from volcanic pits in Africa (take a 3 foot tall stalactite, break it in half vertically; inside are huge, jagged crystals of purple, red, green and blue.  There were seven of them, each weighing 250 to 300 lbs.  To me, the stones and the creatures were as precious as any man made art, classics included; in my world, a natural rainbow always trumps the printed one).

     As for The Wizard, he was the Professor who hired me last month to help him move his first batch of lab equipment and samples.  But this time, he wasn't alone.  In his almost empty home was a Contractor with whom he had apparently done business before.

     I thought they were ready to kill each other.  The Contractor  was a hard working, multi-talented, Conservative entrepreneur, whose businesses ranged from licensed work to renting his own properties.  The Professor was more Liberal,  a bleeding heart rationalist who visibly recoiled at the Contractor's endless "Dittohead/Fox News/ShaunHannity/Limbaugh"-soaked diatribes.   

     As I continued to carry boxes of sensitive equipment back and forth down the stairs, I noticed something else.  The Professor was moving, so he trusted the Contractor to paint and make small repairs for either a prospective buyer or renter.  Likewise, when the Professor offered to pay in advance, the Contractor refused and said  "Just pay me later". 

     Tonight there is a debate of Presidential hopefuls in Iowa; eventually, the President hopes to face one of them in the usual debates.   I am losing interest before the race has even started.  I work a regular white collar job and moonlight frequently, so I know this much is true:  Ordinary people - who respect and trust each other - don't need politicians to help them get things done!

     Always B Positive!